Happy New Year everyone else and look for updates on becoming a Better Father and Healthier in 2010 in coming days.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
A Better Husband
In 1996 I was fortunate to be able to marry the love of my life, the most beautiful and most wonderful woman in the world. My "True Companion" - Felicia.
Over the years we've been very successful with our life together and I know she is very proud and happy with us and of the boys and me. But, I've been doing a lot of thinking and soul searching the past couple of months and I believe I can be much more and much better to her. I'm not sure she agrees with my assessment but... She has been unbelievable with her support, courage, guidance, and most importantly love. I don't feel that I've given the same and I know that I have areas to work on and that's where the commitment to become a Better Husband has come from.
I'm not always the best listener. I'm a great "hearer" but there are many times need to listen better. As with most guys I'm a solver but there are many times when she would like me to just listen...not try to solve...just listen. I don't spend enough time with just her, focusing on just her, and just being with her. And I don't make time for Felicia to get "Felicia time".
So to become the Better Husband I want to be I'm going to be working on becoming a better listener and not such a good "hearer". I'm also going to be working on becoming less of a problem solver when it's not needed...will need lots of help with this one :-). I'm going to work on much more quality time with Felicia focusing on just us. Finally, I will work on freeing up Felicia so she can have more "Felicia time" without worrying about things being taken care of because she isn't doing them.
Hopefully success with the above will allow me to feel that I've become or am becoming more of what I believe Felicia deserves.
Over the years we've been very successful with our life together and I know she is very proud and happy with us and of the boys and me. But, I've been doing a lot of thinking and soul searching the past couple of months and I believe I can be much more and much better to her. I'm not sure she agrees with my assessment but... She has been unbelievable with her support, courage, guidance, and most importantly love. I don't feel that I've given the same and I know that I have areas to work on and that's where the commitment to become a Better Husband has come from.
I'm not always the best listener. I'm a great "hearer" but there are many times need to listen better. As with most guys I'm a solver but there are many times when she would like me to just listen...not try to solve...just listen. I don't spend enough time with just her, focusing on just her, and just being with her. And I don't make time for Felicia to get "Felicia time".
So to become the Better Husband I want to be I'm going to be working on becoming a better listener and not such a good "hearer". I'm also going to be working on becoming less of a problem solver when it's not needed...will need lots of help with this one :-). I'm going to work on much more quality time with Felicia focusing on just us. Finally, I will work on freeing up Felicia so she can have more "Felicia time" without worrying about things being taken care of because she isn't doing them.
Hopefully success with the above will allow me to feel that I've become or am becoming more of what I believe Felicia deserves.
So, why a Blog?
Well, I've decided to make some commitments to my family and set some personal goals and I want to make that commitment in writing. I believe that sharing these commitments and goals with people that will be directly affected in writing will provide further incentive to complete them.
This blog will force me to to take time each day and put my thoughts, actions, and feelings down in a spot that will allow for reflection and what I expect is positive change. Not that I have a ton of things that need to be fixed but there are a few things I want and need to do/be better.
I need to:
I know I am a pretty good husband and a good father but I also know there is room for improvement. This means being there for Felicia, Jack, and Thomas more and making more quality time with each of them together and individually. To succeed with this I am going to rely on all three of them to help me and teach me how to be better.
Regarding #3:
I have become healthier over the past year but I still get lazy and fall off the "health buggy". So I've decided that I am going to focus on this as hard as I focus on becoming a better Husband and Father. By becoming healthier and NOT falling off the "buggy" it will provide Jack and Thomas with better examples and well, it will be better for Felicia also. Again, I'm going to be relying on my family for assistance to be successful.
***More on each of these in upcoming posts***
If you're not part of my life currently and you just happened upon this blog...welcome, and continue to come back to see how things progress. If you are part of my life and you want to spend more time in my head - you need help;-). Seriously, either way, you know or will come to learn that Felicia, Jack, and Thomas are my reason for being; my reason for everything. Without them I would not be the man I am today! And I sure as heck would not have this blog because there wouldn't be any reason to improve myself as a Husband and Father or a reason to become Healthier. I love the rest of my family and my friends but MY REASON is those three. That's how this blog got its name. I've decided that the easiest way to make more time for my family is to make sure my time is completed before their time starts. Meaning I have to do my stuff before they wake or after they sleep, hence "five4three"
five = wake at 5 to exercise
4 = for
three = Felicia, Jack, and Thomas
Up at 5 to workout should allow me to be finished on the "Healthier" part of this transformation before everyone eats breakfast. That will allow me to have more quality time with each of them them during the week and will hopefully make me a Husband and Father.
This "five4three" may be a corny name to some but you have to admit it is pretty easy to remember and gives a great reason to get out of bed when that alarm goes off...sorry Felicia.
Well, hopefully that explains why I've decided to blog - its to allow for a new and better Me. In future entries I'll also add some other stuff including more details and some goals for 2010.
This blog will force me to to take time each day and put my thoughts, actions, and feelings down in a spot that will allow for reflection and what I expect is positive change. Not that I have a ton of things that need to be fixed but there are a few things I want and need to do/be better.
I need to:
- Be a Better Husband
- Be a Better Father
- Become More Healthy
I know I am a pretty good husband and a good father but I also know there is room for improvement. This means being there for Felicia, Jack, and Thomas more and making more quality time with each of them together and individually. To succeed with this I am going to rely on all three of them to help me and teach me how to be better.
Regarding #3:
I have become healthier over the past year but I still get lazy and fall off the "health buggy". So I've decided that I am going to focus on this as hard as I focus on becoming a better Husband and Father. By becoming healthier and NOT falling off the "buggy" it will provide Jack and Thomas with better examples and well, it will be better for Felicia also. Again, I'm going to be relying on my family for assistance to be successful.
***More on each of these in upcoming posts***
If you're not part of my life currently and you just happened upon this blog...welcome, and continue to come back to see how things progress. If you are part of my life and you want to spend more time in my head - you need help;-). Seriously, either way, you know or will come to learn that Felicia, Jack, and Thomas are my reason for being; my reason for everything. Without them I would not be the man I am today! And I sure as heck would not have this blog because there wouldn't be any reason to improve myself as a Husband and Father or a reason to become Healthier. I love the rest of my family and my friends but MY REASON is those three. That's how this blog got its name. I've decided that the easiest way to make more time for my family is to make sure my time is completed before their time starts. Meaning I have to do my stuff before they wake or after they sleep, hence "five4three"
five = wake at 5 to exercise
4 = for
three = Felicia, Jack, and Thomas
Up at 5 to workout should allow me to be finished on the "Healthier" part of this transformation before everyone eats breakfast. That will allow me to have more quality time with each of them them during the week and will hopefully make me a Husband and Father.
This "five4three" may be a corny name to some but you have to admit it is pretty easy to remember and gives a great reason to get out of bed when that alarm goes off...sorry Felicia.
Well, hopefully that explains why I've decided to blog - its to allow for a new and better Me. In future entries I'll also add some other stuff including more details and some goals for 2010.
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